You’re Trending in my Dreams Read online

  SUDEEP NAGARKAR

  You’re Trending in My Dreams

  RANDOM HOUSE INDIA

  Contents

  A Note on the Author

  Prologue

  1. Fourgasm—Four People, Four Lives

  2. Friends Are Forever, Boys Are Whatever

  3. Roomies

  4. Happy Hours of Singlehood

  5. Dear Life, You Suck!

  6. Let’s Get Lost . . .

  7. Loves Me, Loves Me Not

  8. Men Will Be Men

  9. Unexpected Moments

  10. When Nothing Goes Right

  11. Last Slice of Pizza

  12. Breaking the Rules

  13. Karma Is a Sweet Bitch

  14. Do Not Touch Me

  15. For One Last Time

  16. Thinking Back, Looking Forward . . .

  Epilogue

  Acknowledgements

  Follow Random House

  Copyright

  A Note on the Author

  Sudeep Nagarkar has authored five bestselling novels—Few Things Left Unsaid (2011), That’s the Way We Met (2012), It Started with a Friend Request (2013), Sorry, You’re Not My Type (2014) and You’re the Password to My Life (2014).

  He is the recipient of the 2013 Youth Achievers’ Award and has been featured on the Forbes India longlist of the most influential celebrities.

  He also writes for television and has given guest lectures in various renowned institutes and organizations.

  For more information about Sudeep, you can visit www.sudeepnagarkar.in or get in touch with him via his:

  Facebook fan page: facebook.com/sudeepnagarkar

  Facebook profile: facebook.com/nagarkarsudeep

  Twitter handle: sudeep_nagarkar

  Email: [email protected]

  Also by the same author

  You’re the Password to My Life

  Sorry, You’re Not My Type

  It Started with a Friend Request

  That’s the Way We Met

  Few Things Left Unsaid

  To those who tussle for the last slice of pizza with their friends!

  Bade ajeeb hai ye zindagi ke raaste,

  Anjaane mod par kuchh log dost ban jate hain . . .

  Prologue

  Life is like a road full of twists and turns. All you have to do is learn how to drive in such a way that your close ones are protected. You might be as hard as a nail but there is always that one person in your life you are willing to give a second chance to. She was one of them.

  Varun and the others had accepted the grave mistake she had committed without pulling her up.

  ‘Did you take your medicines?’ he asked in concern.

  There was no response from her. She looked traumatized and fiddled with her mobile phone to distract herself from the agony of her recent experience.

  ‘I am asking you. Did you take your medicines?’

  ‘No,’ she replied bluntly.

  ‘Will you put your goddamn phone down and explain what the matter is?’

  ‘Fine. You want to hear my side of the story? I surrendered to the situation. I know I’m partly at fault but I can’t face the consequences. I feel like a trap was set for me and I’ve fallen headlong into it. You don’t trust me, do you?’

  She had tears in her eyes as she looked at him and put her mobile phone aside.

  ‘It isn’t just me, the others trust you as well. But this is just not the right way to behave. I thought you were stronger than this,’ he said, trying to console her.

  She was about to say something but the pain in her head had become unbearable. This was not an unfamiliar pain. Suddenly, the haunting memories of her past that she had kept hidden away came rushing back.

  Varun stroked the back of her head to comfort her. Just as she was about to take a breather, her phone beeped. The screen displayed an unknown number, but the voice on the other end was not unknown. She started shivering. She couldn’t manage to speak a word.

  ‘I will expose you. If you don’t believe me then you can check your WhatsApp messages.’

  The phone got disconnected. With a heavy heart, she managed to look at the mobile screen.

  ‘1 WhatsApp message received.’

  It read, ‘You have just 2 choices. Do as I say or face the consequences.’

  A few pictures and a video accompanied the message. What had happened a few days ago was a mere trailer compared to what she saw in this message. Varun tried asking what was happening but she was devoid of any emotion. She looked dazed. He snatched the phone from her and what he saw shattered the ground beneath his feet.

  The demons she thought she had left behind had come back to haunt her. They left her feeling exposed and vulnerable. She shivered and withdrew under her sheets. What was she running away from? And how soon will it be before her demons caught up with her?

  Women are considered more fragile but nothing is as easily wounded as a man’s ego. It was a man’s bruised ego that had created such a mess in her life!

  While she tried to get some sleep, her roommates speculated on what to do next. No one wanted her to give in to the caller’s demands.

  What do you do when you don’t even know what you want for yourself, because you have always been doing things for others?

  Fourgasm—Four People, Four Lives

  ‘Varun . . . Varun . . . where the hell have you been? Do you take me for a fool?’ Varun’s dad asked in an aggressive tone.

  ‘I don’t care. I don’t give a shit about your nonsense. You are a drunkard and it’s my misfortune that I have to call you Dad,’ Varun responded with equal aggression from his room where he had locked himself in. The father–son relationship had been strained ever since his mother passed away when Varun was still a child.

  Varun was fair-complexioned, with light brown eyes and a slight stubble. He was extremely fond of branded watches and had a huge collection of them. He was very possessive about his watches, and would never allow anyone to even touch them. Girls in his college would go gaga over him but no one mustered the courage to speak about their feelings to him as everyone knew how strict his dad was.

  His father was an ex-army officer and, post his mother’s death, he was brought up in a strict military-style environment where there were ‘rules’ for everything. His father had retired from the military a couple of years ago but still bossed people around. But Varun hated being trapped in the confines of his home. He loved to explore and take risks. There was a flip side to it though. Every time he did something reckless, he would get a beating from his dad. Things didn’t end there. His father would shoot the choicest expletives at him and torture him mentally when he was drunk. All this was slowly making Varun retreat into a shell. He had changed from the jovial person he was to a person with limited interactions with the outside world.

  Varun dreamed of running away from the cage his dad had built for him. He always felt from his father’s attitude that he never really loved him and that realization made him miss his mother even more. He would pen down his innermost thoughts in a diary whenever he could. But he was no writer or anything. His desire was to one day become an entrepreneur and do as his heart desired rather than opting for a job and be enslaved by a handful. He believed in the adage ‘It’s not about the ideas, but making ideas often’.

  ‘Come out, you son of a—’ his dad shouted yet again.

  But before he could finish, Varun yelled from inside, ‘Mind your tongue! And lay off me!’

  The reason for their heated discussion was that Varun wanted to shift to Mumbai to pursue BSc and had even applied for the course but his dad wanted him to join the army. Varun wanted to do as he pleased and was not going to let anythi
ng come in the way of his ambitions—least of all his father. He picked up the phone and called his friend Ahana in frustration.

  ‘That’s it! I just can’t take it any more. I want to run away from all this nonsense,’ Varun complained.

  ‘Why don’t you come over and stay in my flat in Mumbai? A couple of other girls are sharing it with me and I am sure they won’t mind if you join in. Of course, that’s if you feel safe with three girls around you.’ She laughed.

  ‘That’s awesome! I will carry my headphones along so that I don’t have to listen to all your girl talk,’ Varun teased.

  The conversation relieved his frustration to an extent and helped him make up his mind—to run away to Mumbai and join the BSc course he had applied for.

  ‘I’m only worried that once your parents find out, they might inform my dad about me staying in your apartment,’ Varun said.

  ‘Don’t worry. My dad won’t bother. Your dad at least cares to throw you a slap or a few harsh words. My dad just throws some money into my account every month and thinks he is done,’ she added.

  ‘Let me think about it some more,’ Varun replied.

  ‘It’s your choice at the end of the day. But I seriously feel you need to get out of the shithole that you call home. Please. Just do this for me, if not for yourself?’

  ‘All right. You’re such a good friend, Ahana. I’m glad to have you in my life.’

  After the brief discussion over the phone, Varun ended the call. It was final now—he was going to shift to Mumbai without fearing the consequences. He was all set to checkmate his dad’s violence and break free from the cage of restriction. He was going to move into the apartment rented by his friend Ahana!

  One month earlier

  ‘Dad, I’ve secured admission in NIFT, Mumbai, and college begins within a month. Finally I’m going to live my dream of becoming a top fashion designer,’ Ahana exclaimed in excitement.

  Ahana was full of life and passion. She enjoyed late night parties and lived the life of a princess even though she was still in school since her dad was a rich Delhi-based businessman. She was a real beauty—fair and flawless skin, sparkling eyes that expressed thousands of emotions and a smile that could bring the world to a standstill. She loved shopping and was extremely brand conscious—only wearing the best brands like Zara and Forever 21. The tattoo on the side of her neck added to her charm. It showed the world that she had a modern and independent outlook. She had grown strong, building a firm foundation with the bricks thrown at her.

  She wanted to be one of the top fashion designers in the country and her dreams meant the world to her. Often we come across people who are constantly trying to make others around them happy. But when we look deeper at them, we find that such people are pretty lonely themselves. She was one of them. Though she was quite the social butterfly, she had only a handful of trustworthy and close friends including Varun, who happened to be the son of her father’s close friend.

  She always sought attention and love from her dad but all she ever got was money. She still had immense respect for him but somewhere she missed the paternal love that every child yearns for. The way a father treats his daughter shapes how she views herself and how she expects to be treated by other men around her for the rest of her life. Her father had never expressed his fondness for her and so she never took men seriously. Neither did she care about getting into a romantic relationship. She just lived in the moment.

  So when she excitedly told her dad about having secured admission in Mumbai, she expected him to get excited as well. However, he continued to work on his iPad without bothering to even look up. She thought that he might get up and hug her. After all, every girl wants her dad to be with her in all the good times and shower her with love and praise.

  ‘Congrats! I will transfer the money for your fees. You can stay in our flat in Mumbai. No need to look for a hostel,’ her dad replied with his eyes glued to the iPad.

  ‘Okay, Dad,’ Ahana replied and went to her room in a dejected state.

  When a father ignores his daughter, she spends her life trying to replace him in her heart. If he is warm and nurturing, she will look for a lover to equal him. If he thinks she is beautiful, worthy and feminine, she will be inclined to see herself that way.

  Ahana had accepted her dad the way he was. In Ahana’s case, it was not that her dad didn’t appreciate her, but work pressure didn’t allow him to spend enough time with her as she was growing up. However, she was strong and her strength didn’t come from lifting weights—it came from lifting herself up whenever she was knocked down.

  In the next couple of days, she shifted to her own flat at Sea Woods, Navi Mumbai, though there were still a couple of weeks left for college to begin. She wanted to get used to the ‘Mumbai Way of Life’. Plus she wanted to look for a roommate to stay with because she didn’t want to live alone and the idea of having a roommate excited her. She advertised online as there were many colleges in Navi Mumbai and students do look around for shared rooms. But she didn’t find an appropriate girl for over a week. After a fortnight, her routine began and she gradually settled down to her new life. She still continued to splurge on unnecessary things as her father would transfer enough money into her account every month. The search for a roommate finally came to a close when she bumped into a girl named Malvika at the gym where she exercised. Malvika too was looking for a room nearby and Ahana took an instant liking to her.

  ‘Ahana, will there be room for another girl to join us? I have a friend who is looking for a place to stay. Her name’s Garima. Are you okay with her moving in with us?’ Malvika asked one day at the gym before accepting Ahana’s offer.

  ‘Absolutely fine. You can both shift tomorrow itself. I am sure we will have a blast staying together,’ Ahana winked.

  The next day, Malvika and her friend Garima shifted to Ahana’s apartment. Ahana had made it clear to Malvika that she was a party buff and drank on weekends. Malvika was all too pleased upon hearing this since she too loved to party and drink. Though Malvika’s friend was the opposite of her, she was pretty cool when it came to things like this.

  You will never find someone who is perfect. Everyone has their issues; the trick is to find someone with issues you can deal with. As time passed, they had learnt the trick to give each other the freedom to be who they really were.

  It was a weekend when Ahana received Varun’s call. They had hardly talked after Ahana shifted to Mumbai.

  ‘Hey, how are you?’ Ahana asked.

  ‘Everything’s terrible. Worst of all, you seem to have forgotten me,’ Varun added.

  ‘Shut up, you asshole. Tell me what’s bothering you now. Must be your dad. What else!’ she laughed.

  ‘I just can’t take it any more. I want to run away from all this nonsense.’’

  ‘Didn’t I tell you to come over and stay in my flat in Mumbai? Don’t worry. It’s going to be fine,’ she said.

  Their conversation continued for some time until Varun made up his mind to shift to her flat. She put the phone down and waited for Malvika and her friend to return from college. She wanted their opinion on Varun’s situation and whether they were comfortable with having a guy move in with them.

  It was while having dinner that Ahana brought up the topic. They had a detailed discussion about it and Ahana assured both of them that Varun was a trustworthy and genuine person.

  ‘There is no reason to fear. You can trust me and I assure you guys, you will love his company too,’ she said.

  ‘What about the neighbours? What if they come to know about it?’ Malvika added.

  ‘I don’t give a damn about the neighbours. It’s my house, so who are they to decide who I should stay with?’ Ahana said firmly.

  ‘I am cool with it. Is he hot?’ Malvika asked with a mischievous grin.

  ‘Totally!’

  Malvika laughed and they gave each other a high five. Living together with a guy was a thrilling idea. She had no objection to sharing a flat wi
th a guy; in fact she was pretty excited about it. However, her friend Garima was a bit worried, not because she was orthodox or old-fashioned, but because of her own circumstances. Her past experiences had made her keep her distance from everyone. She took her own time to get comfortable with new people. And the idea of living with a guy didn’t excite her at all. However, Malvika convinced her that it wouldn’t be such a big deal and that she was always there by her side, so she had nothing to fear! Garima finally gave in.

  Two weeks earlier

  ‘Why did you upload such a depressing status on Facebook? There is no point in sobbing over the past,’ Malvika chided. Her friend Garima had just updated her Facebook status with: Time will heal the haunting memories of the past . . . but will never completely erase them.

  Malvika was a Mumbaikar who had taken admission in DYP Dental College, Nerul, Navi Mumbai. As her home was at a considerable distance from her college, she preferred to stay in the college hostel to save on travelling time. She was mature enough for her age, compassionate and caring. She was the girl you’d rather talk to in bed than take to bed. Hot girls play with your heart, decent girls mend it. She knew how to speak her mind intelligently and captivate others with her words and opinions. Her words were what made her the woman she was, enchanting and dreamy. Her beauty radiated from the purity within her that made her look effortlessly beautiful. Her dimples made guys go gaga. She wanted a guy who could touch her heart and soul.

  ‘It’s true, Malvika. Even though time will heal the painful memories of the past to a certain extent, it will never completely erase them. And anyway, what’s the point of raking up past issues when no one believes me? Not even my own mom,’ Garima muttered in a sad tone and eventually changed the subject.

  Malvika wanted to know more about Garima’s past to ease her pain but preferred not to probe too much as it might hurt Garima more that doing her any good. It was the second week of college. Malvika and Garima had met on the first day and had become friends instantly as they shared the same hostel room. Garima was from Madhya Pradesh and had shifted to Mumbai for the same dental course as Malvika’s. A chubby, sweet girl who was an introvert, she was not shy or meek but she preferred not to go out for reasons better known to her. Since she was still a virgin, she was often taunted by her classmates. Her circumstances had shaped her personality in a certain way and though she tried to be more outgoing, it was genuinely difficult for her to be so. She was not at all old-fashioned but preferred to stay away from relationships and be with a limited set of people with whom she was comfortable. Surprisingly, she gelled very well with Malvika and they soon became good friends. Bored with the tasteless hostel food they were served day in and day out, they decided to search for a PG near college. It would also mean freedom from the restrictions that came with staying on the hostel premises.